The 7 Types Of Instagram Likes

When it comes to Instagram, we’re creepy. We know the prime time to post photos, and which filter makes us look our greatest. We know how to stalk someone’s life without the deathly double tap to about 88 weeks ago. We know a like doesn’t really just mean you liked the photo. There’s more thought put into liking instagram photo than meets the eye. So here are the 7 types of instagram likes we are all guilty of.. Because when it comes down to it, we’re all shit people, and sadly this is how 2015 works.

1.The “I Feel Bad For You” Like
This is the worst type of like, the like you toss around when you pity someone. Maybe for some it’s the smart friend who lends you their school notes. Maybe it’s a weird person from high school you’re sorta kinda friends with but not really. Or maybe it’s just someone who didn’t post during prime time, and you know you liking his or her photo will really help. Whatever it may be, you feel bad. We’ve all been there. You know what it’s like to stair at your phone wondering where you went wrong. So you decide to be a hero and mix in a double tap to this poor souls way, because you’re like a super good person.


2. The Shade Like
This is probably the shadiest like in the game, but wowza does it ever feel great to do. It’s usually saved for someone you secretly really, really dislike, and you throw a like in there, it almost goes unnoticed.. But, not actually. Oh their dog died? LIKE. Sad quote about being single? LIKE. Shit, they got into a little car accident, and spilt coffee on themselves and felt the need to instagram it? LIKE LIKE LIKE. Okay, this may come off as mean and unconventional, but it’s almost like gloating in secrecy.. and who doesn’t love to gloat?

insta fight.gif

3. The Hate Like
This is for the one person you hate.. like really, really hate. Maybe it’s someone who has done you wrong. Maybe it’s a girl whose dating the guy who you hooked up with, or maybe it’s your ex’s new girlfriend and for some insane reason you’re following her on instagram. Either way, when you like this person’s photo, it’s not because you actually like it. You could care less. Relatively, this means “I see you, and I still do not like you, and when you see my name, I hope you realize I think you’re still a shit person”


4.The Jealous Like
This is a toughie. Odds are, you really do like the person who posted this photo. They’re probably really nice, really pretty, and really really have their life together. Must be nice. Than again… sometimes, they’re too much of these things. How are you so candid? Who did your makeup? I don’t remember you looking like that in person??? The jealous like is reserved for the girl who started dating that super hot guy who you see in your dreams, or the person who had the perfect Turks and Cacaos vaca. Or y’know, that one girl with big tit’s whose also super smart and really good at something you wish you were good at. You only like her pictures hoping her perfect life will some how rub off on you. Yes, it’s pathetic. BUT, don’t deny the facts. Just keep your jealously behind closed doors. 

little girl middle finger.png

5. The Obligated Like
It could be your best friend, your sibling, or a classmate. Either way, you don’t really have a choice. No matter what dumb photo this person posts, you have to like it. Super awkward adult selfie? Like.

dumb people

6.The “Slide Into My Dm’s Like”
Odds are I didn’t think your photo from 8 weeks ago was a nice photo, or that any photo you post is that interesting for that matter. I just think your face is nice.. we should chat sometime. Odds are you’ve done this because as sad as it is… it’s 2015 and this is how 70% of couples have met, and hookups have been acquired.. Whether anyone admits it or not.

                                                      ^Not actually though^

7.The Real Like
This is what instagram is all about. It’s the like you give when you, well.. actually really do like something someone posted. It can be a newborn baby, or someone sharing their summer travels of hiking a mountain somewhere beautiful and desirable. It’s something that maybe made you laugh really hard, or really think about your life. It doesn’t happen often, but when you see something you like, it’s kinda sad how it can be taken to heart. Something that makes you want to get off instagram and go do something exciting. Put on some pants, stop staring at your phone and go do something cool! For the love of all things basic, dooooooo it ! And no, by that I don’t mean going out and Instagraming your Christmas starbucks cup. Take an adventure!!!

That’s all for today playas! Countdown to Friday is on.

Brittany Peretin



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